I dropped out of a BFA Musical Theater program in NY at the end of ‘06.

I came home and ate a cruise liner’s weight in Cheerios.

I started school at GSU and hated it. I did nothing to combat this hatred like join a club or try to make friends.

I somehow lost ten pounds.

I spent many agonizing weeks researching careers and soul searching to figure out my future.

I continued taking lots of pictures to document my life, a project I began in ‘05.

I de-junked my room.

I discovered that I good at drawing and art in general.

I began to write for fun more. I began an idea on a screenplay.

I became closer with my best friend from high school, Brooke.

I got three As and one C in my first classes.

I applied for and got a job as a barista at my neighborhood Starbucks.

I got two Bs in my summer school classes.

I became closer with my NY friend, Kristine.

I bought myself a Macbook laptop have been in love ever since.

I was finally diagnosed with ADD and given medication to help it.

I cleaned and organized my room.

I went to NYC with my family for a week at the end of the summer and had an amazing time.

I finally hit upon the idea of film directing as a potential career.

I went back to NY, to Buffalo, to visit the friends I had made there while in school.

I decorated my room.

I started to become better friends with people I work with.

I began an idea for a play.

I got an HD video camera for Christmas.

I will get a new cell phone in January.

New Year’s is here!  2008.  Wild.  This is a (long) list of my silly insecurities from ‘07, responded to by my sensible, sane self.  They are my New Year’s resolutions.  Enjoy…

I don’t have a driver’s license…GET ONE. Practice parallel parking ’til your hands bleed.

I bite my cuticles…Stop it. Make time and excuses to get manicures.

I‘ve never been kissed and am afraid I’ll never find love…Shut UP. Nobody cares. Almost everyone finds someone, why not you? It may not be in 2008, but it’ll happen. While you wait for LOVE, find someone to just goof around with. It’ll be FUN.

I take four prescription medications for mood disorder, ADD, OCD, anxiety, and depression…Suck it up. Everyone has their crosses to bear. Don’t collapse; your problems aren’t too bad in comparison with the rest of the world’s. You’ve improved as you’ve grown, too. You’ll be almost “normal” soon enough.

I hardly ever put away my clothes…Put them away. NOW. Just do it if it bothers you that much. Use this advice in other areas as well. If there is something nagging at you, don’t let it sit there ’til you go insane, just DO IT.

I count calories…If you feel you have to count calories to have control, then go ahead. It’s better than becoming anorexic and bulimic. If you have tendencies to be crazy about food, choose the safest solution. But don’t go overboard.

I hate America…Don’t hate America; it isn’t all bad. America still has excellent qualities that many other countries don’t. Don’t hate. Just be sorry. Mourn your loss of innocence and patriotism. Feel sorry for the stupid people who have let us devolve in this way. America may never be what it used to be, but it isn’t dead yet. It isn’t Iraq. Be grateful.

I write emo poetry…Ew, why? Don’t waste your time with crap no one will read. Get on the horse and write that play! That screenplay! Turn your angsty emotions into art that people can actually appreciate someday. Write, damn you, write!

I stutter…Okay, no one cares, so you shouldn’t either. Worrying about stuttering makes you do it more. Don’t let it hold you back EVER AGAIN! Speak when you want to, don’t overprepare what you will say, and don’t avoid situations where you’ll have to speak. God, seriously, get over yourself.

I hate cooking…That’s too bad. Find out what exactly about it you hate and maybe you’ll reveal some hidden insecurity or something. Maybe your fears of gaining weight have actually made you dislike and fear food itself. But you love making drinks at Starbucks. It doesn’t make sense. Figure it out this next year.

I’m afraid of growing up…Okay, Peter Pan, get over it, because you have been growing up, little by little your whole life. You are just at a stage right now that seems insurmountable. Once you get your license, the word will feel like it’s opening up. You will learn something new everyday. And other things will fall into place. They will. Don’t force anything. Take things as they come. Financial Aid. Doctors. Insurance. Take control over your life. And you’ll be surprised how adult you’ll feel by the end of 2008.

I have been an atheist my whole life…If that’s how you are and you feel you aren’t suppressing any latent religious feelings, then congratulations. You have solved your own personal mystery. Many don’t ever solve it. Some people just don’t ever feel a connection with God and that’s okay. You’re not a bad person. Read up on some other famous atheists to see how you aren’t alone.

I have never smoked or done drugs…Good for you. They are harmful, toxic substances that only lead to bad outcomes if done often. Good for you for standing up for what you believe in.

I have only taken two tiny sips of alcohol in my life…Whatever. Having been drunk isn’t some badge of honor that people inspect when they meet you. Sure, alcohol is a big relating factor in almost everyone’s lives, but so are many other things. Use the fact that you don’t drink to your advantage. No one worth knowing will look down on you for it. And some may even respect you more for it. So quit whining.

I take long walks alone at night or run treadmill in the dark…That’s actually a very good way to de-stress after a long day. Exercise releases endorphins that calms your system, and in the dark, you can have more control over your thoughts. If you can program yourself to think positively while exercising, you will end up being a happier person.

I wear a size 12…Well, you’re tall, you have wide-set hips, and you don’t like to wear skintight clothes. It doesn’t mean you’re fat. Don’t worry about it. And if it bugs you that much, just eat less, exercise more, and get into a size 10. It shouldn’t be too hard.

I am 6 feet tall in two inch heels…Stop complaining about your height! So many girls would love to be that tall. And plenty of guys love it too. So wear your size proudly. Don’t shrink down like some wilting flower. Stand the fuck up. Wear heels. Don’t care.

I am willing to spend lots of money on clothing…Haha, you’re a girl. The clothes you buy now aren’t ludicrously expensive. If they make you happy and you have extra cash, then go right ahead. Don’t spend too much, though. That dress from NY was insane.

My dad owns more than 2000 DVDs…Watch them. Absorb them. You want to be a film director, right? This is your perfect chance to learn while you’re not in Film School. Take advantage of the galore.

I am hardly ever content…Well, fuck. That’s partially your brain chemistry, but it’s also partially the way you think. The thoughts you put in your head are twisted. Talk to your therapist about ways to combat these thoughts. You have hardly anything to feel discontent about, honestly. Love your life. Learn to love it while you live it.

I’ve never broken a bone or been sick or injured…Yay! Don’t start this year.

All my childhood friends said I was too clingy, and that’s why I’m afraid of reaching out to people now…Screw those elementary school bitches. You should be past this. You are a great person to know, and a caring and loyal friend. Call people to hang out. Reach out and you’ll see how much people wanted you to.